6. They may be a perfectionist.
Perfectionism often arises as an unhealthy way to cope with deep feelings of inadequacy. A person may develop an unconscious drive to be flawless, believing that by achieving perfection, they can finally gain the love and approval that were missing in childhood. Unfortunately, perfection is impossible to attain, leaving them trapped in a constant cycle of self-criticism and never feeling truly worthy.
7. They may be people-pleasers.
People-pleasers prioritize others’ needs over their own to get approval or avoid conflict. Such people often suppress their own desires and boundaries to make others happy. When doing so, they are repeating behaviors they learned as a child whereby they longed to be told nice things by their caregivers or were afraid of the consequences if they did not obey.
8. They may experience anxiety.
Chronic anxiety or hypervigilance can be caused by a lack of emotional safety and stability as a child. A person who is constantly on edge, overly sensitive, or overthinking fuels their own anxiety because they are trying to perceive emotional threats before they present themselves.
9. They may be afraid of conflict.
Adults who grew up without emotional support often steer clear of confrontation out of fear of rejection. As a result, they may struggle to voice their true feelings or needs within relationships. Rather than risk conflict, they choose silence—enduring unmet needs and emotional discomfort for the sake of keeping the peace.
10. They may have attachment issues.
Emotional neglect can cause anxious or avoidant attachment styles. They may cling to others out of fear of abandonment or maintain emotional distance in order to protect themselves from being hurt. These maladaptive coping skills make it very difficult for the person to form or maintain healthy relationships.
11. They may have difficulty setting boundaries.
A kid who lacks support may struggle to assert their needs and set healthy boundaries as an adult. They will often feel guilty or uncomfortable doing so, as if they are an inconvenience in the relationship. And since they avoid conflict, they don’t defend their boundaries even if they manage to voice them.
12. They may have a tendency toward codependency.
In certain situations, they may develop codependent relationships. Growing up without emotional support can lead an adult to overcompensate by tying their sense of self-worth to how much others depend on them. They may become the emotional support system—or crutch—for someone else, often sacrificing their own needs and boundaries in the process. This pattern usually comes at the cost of their well-being and emotional health.